Sheesh

Song of today: None
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Today… Sigh. Sometimes it feels as though you can’t continue. But I have to… If you know what I mean. Today, it just feels like its such a down day… Right, let me get my thoughts straight (if I can). Sigh.

I wish I could just let everything out, all my frustrations, all my stress, everything… Lets go down one by one…

Yes, Nicole is right to point out that I do look/feel stressed. You’re not the only one, Carol told me also and Weijie thinks so to. I do feel a bit stressed. Yet, when I try to figure it out, I just can’t think straight, logically… I should go for another walk again…. Maybe its due to pressure from home to do well in school… I know mom wants me to get As, not Bs and Cs as she’s said before. There are numerous projects and assignments to complete. Thanks Carol for the encouragement. =)

Then there’s… What else is there? Another perfect example of me not being able to think straight, systematically and logically. My thoughts are random and sporadic. I feel worn out by everything. One day, I may very well breakdown.

Just another 2 months and this semester will be over. And then, most prolly I can get someone to examine why I feel so negative and all. =/ Am I getting these viruses as a result of all this? Colds, headaches… Sigh…. I feel as though there is a lot of negative energy inside me, all stored up. I need an outlet for release… Arrrgh. A few certain things can make it all turn around, better… But sadly, these few things are not around/present.

Whatever happened to hoping for a brighter tomorrow? What happened? What happened to me? I don’t wanna remain like this.

Aight, lets continue… As I was walking back from school, had this headache come on… Was kinda bad… So came home at about 5pm and slept, but was still having that headache. Mom and dad and Fred went out, but I stayed back. Head was spinning… Took two panadol pills and that finally did the trick. Sigh. Its just sad… Damn, I feel disappointed.

Sigh… Do I sound depressing? I think I do. Maybe I’m just moody? I realize how cyclical my life is nowdays. High-point and then slowly dribble down to a low-point where its dry, and then something will give me another boost and its back to my high-point.

Have I been forgotten? Am I invisible? I… Hope not.

Anyway, I have a few people to thank…
Fano, thanks for sharing your story. Like I said, whatever happens, I will accept it whether I like it or not. I don’t want to think of it right now, cause… Sigh, I’m too attached to certain things right now.
Spyne, thanks dude. You’ve no idea how much help ye’ve been. I gotta talk to you more sometime… There’s more I need to say.
Luigi, thanks for listening bud. I know, I sound like a mess in those messages don’t I?

*On a lighter note…
“I will go down with this ship,
And I won’t up hands up, and surrender,
There will be no white flag above my door
I’m in love, and always will be…”
Listening to White Flag, I feel a bit better to continue to press on and come through victorious. I know I will somehow make it through. I will.